journeys
With Parkes Harman
9/30/2018 0 Comments Journeys in Tom Cruise RunningThis is the first of many posts I will write on this blog regarding my love for film... Something that I will probably explore more in depth overtime, but for this post, I want to focus on a specific and special encounter I had with film this summer. As I've talked about in the past, this was a bit of a difficult summer for me, mainly due to a severe wave of depression. A lot of safety nets I had in the past when dealing with depression, such as nature, music, and especially film, had failed me to some extent. In other words, when I felt like I was drowning in an ocean of despair, these very things kept me afloat. Except, whenever I tried to engage with nature, listen to music, or watch movies, it reminded me to some degree of my emptiness, which only worsened it. Probably the most defeating moment of this experience was trying to watch Spider-Man 2-- a film that always leaves me uplifted-- only to feel disappointingly hollow and unaffected by the experience. Much like Peter Parker, who gave up being Spider-Man when it lost its power to him, I gave up on film when it lost the magic that it had radiated with for most of my life. Then I watched Mission Impossible: Fallout (Disclaimer: very light spoilers for the plot from Fallout. nothing significant will be discussed). I've seen Mission Impossible films in the past, but I never thought too much of them aside from being dazzled by the flashy set pieces. Because of this, I went into Fallout based on good reviews and my relatively low expectations. Maybe a light action film is what I need to take my mind off of depression. And DAMN was I right in the best way possible. Fallout is the sixth film in the Mission Impossible franchise and follows IMF agent Ethan Hunt (played by Tom Cruise) as he attempts to thwart a nuclear threat by a sect of rogue agents called The Apostles. Long story short, the world is at risk, and the only people who can save it are Ethan Hunt and his IMF team. The film opens with a dream sequence in the mind of Hunt, where he is marrying Julia (played by Michelle Monaghan), his wife from the third MI film, except his arch nemesis Soloman Lane (played by Sean Harris) is reading their vows, focusing specifically on all the misdemeanors Hunt has committed since their marriage. All of this, right before the world blows up, taking Julia with it. There are a few ideas at play in this scene. First, Hunt is reliving one of the happiest memories of his life, but things are not quite as they were when it originally happened. Second, and perhaps the main reason things are not how they should be, he has to contend with the negative consequences of his actions. The fallout of all his heroic, good intentioned, world saving actions. And then, quite literally, a nuclear fallout; a potential and inevitable reality that may come of all his world-saving some day. This is why Hunt cannot look back on his marriage with fondness; his guilty conscious fears the day where the amount of goodness and compassion behind his responsibility to save the world spills over into the destruction of everything he loves. Should any person take the weight of the world on their shoulders, even if they know that weight may be too much for them to bear, resulting in the destruction of everything important to them? This is the big question of Fallout, and its a question that I had been contending with for much of that summer too. The film takes its time to establish and develop this theme, but I knew from the start what Ethan Hunt was feeling; the dilemma he was plagued with, and how far he was willing to go to resolve that internal struggle. So, in the very next scene, when Ethan wakes up from his nightmare and finds a courier knocking at his door to hand him his next mission briefing-- a nuclear threat by the Apostles-- I knew just as well as Ethan Hunt that there was no way his answer could be anything other than yes. There was no way he wasn't going to try and prove his guilty conscious wrong, and demonstrate that good intentions always payoff. I knew this, because I had attempted to prove the same thing several times before. Goodness is eventually rewarded by goodness. Right? For the next two and a half hours, we watch Ethan Hunt attempt to prove the very same thing to himself. Of course, in the style of a Mission Impossible film, things don't go as planned from the very beginning. This creates deadly consequences, and drives Hunt to push himself further and faster than he ever has previously. Not just because the fate of the world is at stake, but also because he needs to know that his good intentions will have a good outcome. He simply cannot confront the fallout of his actions, because it would also mean the very destruction of his well-being. However, as mentioned before, their plan repeatedly falls apart, and raises the stakes higher and higher. Are these simply unplanned circumstances forcing the IMF team to reevaluate their strategy? Or is this the fallout that Hunt dreaded coming to fruition? Ethan Hunt goes to nearly inhuman lengths to prevent that fallout from ever truly occurring. Whether performing halo jumps, driving a motorcycle through the streets of Paris, dangling from the side of a Helicopter, or running at an unnaturally great pace for a 56 year old man, Tom Cruise is giving this performance beyond his all. And for the character, that physical performance further establishes the lengths Hunt is willing to go to prevent his fears from coming true. What's incredible about Fallout, aside from what I've already discussed about the story, is that all the stunts in this film are practical. Maybe Cruise is wearing a wire when he's climbing into a helicopter. But that helicopter is actually airborne. Maybe Cruise has a parachute to land safely after his HALO jump. But he is actually jumping from a C-17 plane at 25,000 feet (apparently they filmed a total 106 jumps for that scene). The same goes for the motorcycle chase, car chase, boat chase, and every other other chase scene in the film. All of it with Tom Cruise, who has become infamous for doing all of his own stunts. This dedication to practical stunt work is important not just because it's more impressive to the audience than performing stuntmen or CGI stunts, but because it's real. Fallout rides dangerously close to the line of disbelief in action film stunts, but avoids crossing it because, well, everything you're watching was actually attempted and is possible. This is far more impressive than the previous MI films, where there is, at times, an over-reliance on sci-fi gadgets and CGI stunts. And then there I am, sitting in a packed theater, watching a character being put to his absolute limits to prevent his own fallout, in complete awe. A character, who, I saw myself in, as any good movie allows you to do. A character giving every ounce of himself to stop his worst fear from coming true. The moment where I think the film became more than just a film for me, was during a sequence where Ethan Hunt is running rooftop to rooftop to catch one of the film's antagonists. Running is one of my proudest hobbies. I ran cross country and track in high school, which gave me some of the happiest moments of my high school career. It represents a couple of different things to me (which would be fun to explore in a future blog post), but more than anything else, I see it as a test of endurance. How far can you push your physical limits, how fast can you go while doing that, and how much can you punish your body before you decide you have had enough? Running enforces impressive answers to these questions, and conditions a stronger mindset in the face of punishment dealt in life itself. That strong fortitude I had developed over years of running was wearing thin that summer from dealing with depression and anxiety. To use my earlier analogy; it felt like I was fighting to stay afloat in the ocean of despair, and letting the waves just carry me who-knows-where seemed like a fair option. That's why watching the incredible foot chase scene in Mission Impossible: Fallout was more than just a scene for me. It was a reflection of the person I want to be. The person who goes to their limits to do what they felt like was saving the world. This is amplified by the fact the film's stunts are heavily practical and never totally cross the line of disbelief. It left me thrilled and inspired. I walked out of Mission Impossible: Fallout feeling completely washed over. I had been on a two and a half hour journey jumping from airplanes, motorcycling through the streets of Paris, sprinting across rooftops in London, and dangling from a helicopter in Nepal, trying to save the world. More than that, I had tried to prove something I have always struggled with. If I go fast enough, work hard enough, and push myself far enough, I can stop my good intentions from hurting those I love most. But did Ethan Hunt completely prove that? Yes and no. This is the part where I tell you to watch the movie to completely understand what I mean. Nobody is truly Superman, regardless of how much faith we have in our abilities. Because of this, some sort of sacrifice will always be necessary. Though that may seem like a failure of our nature, its a victory of what we don't have to lose. If I can save five people and lose one, I'd rather do that than lose all. And, at the end of the day, knowing my actions will at least save five people is enough to motivate me to always work harder. Say what you will about Tom Cruise's personal life choices (mostly in regards to Scientology), but he is possibly the hardest working actor on the planet. Aside from being in a very long list of critically acclaimed films and box-office hits, Cruise puts 110% into every role. The fact that not only does he perform all of his stunts, but basically all of those stunts are batshit crazy, is probably one of the most impressive physical character performance feats since Buster Keaton. Of course I can't neglect the incredible stunt choreographers behind all of Cruise's stunts and Christopher McQuarrie's brilliant direction, but Cruise's unyielding dedication to his craft is, again, inspiring. Given the low place I was at this summer, and what this film did to inspire me, Tom Cruise sorta became my hero. He demonstrated, where other film couldn't, the value in giving your all to something that may not always be for your benefit. Cruise has always put his career above himself, and goes to nearly inhuman lengths because he knows the power of a good movie. He probably never considered (or maybe he did) that his dedication would inspire someone like me, someone at one of their lowest points, that maybe you can stop the fallout. And who's to say I was the only person who felt that way too? From the bottom of my heart, thank you Tom Cruise, and thank you Christopher McQuarrie for Mission Impossible: Fallout. (P.S. it comes out on dvd on December 4th)
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9/6/2018 0 Comments Journeys in Online FriendshipI've been in college for about three weeks now. Between all the things I spent my gap year preparing for, whether that be the workload, the responsibilities of being more independent, or being smart with my money, the one thing I least considered would be the difficulty of making friends. We're all adults in over our heads, friends will just come natural, right? Not necessarily. In fact, the more I engage in social interaction, the more I find myself paralyzed by it. Sometimes the words pour out in the wrong order. Sometimes I mix two words together and create something new and meaningless. Sometimes I will open my mouth and nothing will come out. I feel like an alien, and it's incredibly frustrating. And I'm not so sure what the cause is. I mean, it's most likely a consequence of my social anxiety, and the anxiety of being in a new environment filled with new people in general. What if they don't like my shoes? What if they think my hair is stupid? But even in instances where these thoughts don't cross my mind, I end up tripping over my words. Maybe I need to be more comfortable here before I can feel collected enough to fill the air with something other than my alien language. Up to this point, if it weren't for my online friends, college would be pretty lonely. Ah, yes... my online friends. I'm not sure if people still hold reservations about meeting strangers over the internet and online friendships, and I sincerely hope they do not, because online friendship has been one of the most impacting aspects of my entire life. And again, if it weren't for my online friends, there might be several dozen more moments of loneliness throughout my life that I wouldn't have made it through. I had my first taste of online friendship when I was 12, in a massively multiplayer online game (MMO), called Clone Wars Adventures. It was based on an absolute banger of an animated show on Cartoon Network at the time, Star Wars: The Clone Wars. The game was no where near as good, but tween me was indifferent to such things. I played the game religiously, earning every trophy, buying every item in the store, and building up a huge list of friends. Of course, much like a Facebook, most of the people on my friends list were not my friends. But a tiny percentage definitely were, and I was about to seek them out. Around the same time in real life, I was starting middle school in an entirely new school district. I spent my grade school years in a small private school, so making the jump to public school alone was a big, somewhat terrifying change. I was constantly lonely-- always unsure how to talk to other people my age and afraid that the words wouldn't come out right from my mouth. It's bizarre to think of the parallels between now and 7 years ago-- virtually a lifetime ago-- but it says a lot about the struggle I've always had in making friends. There were a few very important people who were there for me in real life, and those people are probably the ones I have to thank for giving me at least a little bit of courage in trying to make friends. Albeit, those friends I made were not where most people would make them. Shortly after starting middle school, I made my first real online friend, a dude who went by Jirak. We had a similar sense of humor and usually had a swell time together playing the game. Eventually we thought it would be neat to get closer as friends, so we video chatted each other on Skype. Initially I thought I may be making a big mistake, or that Jirak would not be the person I thought of him as. But he was every bit of the dude he made himself out to be, and I credit that to our genuine interest in being closer friends. Around May of 2012, Jirak and I started up a squad (like a community or guild for players of the game) in CWA called Survivors of the Siege. While I focused on setting up the structure of the squad, Jirak went on a massive recruiting spree. Together, we gave the squad a solid foundation that would propel its growth throughout the rest of the year. I'm not sure whether to chalk it up to fate or pure coincidence, but some of the people Jirak and I recruited would eventually become a few of the best friends I have today. From the moment we built the squad, I was very passionate about creating a welcoming, inclusive atmosphere for all who joined. I knew how it felt to be an outcast, and that no one should ever have to feel the same thing in the parameters of the squad. With that mission in mind, Survivors would become a highly-social, positive, and self-sustaining community of gamers from all over the world uniting for their love of video games and, well, Star Wars. As I became acquainted with more members of the squad, I began to notice a strange pattern. A lot of the people who were most active in the community were also outcasts of some sort in real life. One of my best friends today, Davie, was someone who reached out to me after I left a nice comment on one of his YouTube videos about the game. The day I invited him to join the squad he was pelted with an overwhelming amount of hello's, welcome's, and other friendly responses. Davie later described this moment to me as 'the most welcomed he has ever felt.' From there on, Davie and I would hangout over video chat and Skype, talking Star Wars, recording podcasts, and bonding over different video games. When he was comfortable enough, he revealed to me that he had Asperger's Syndrome (something my parents were half convinced I showed signs of when I was a bit younger). I had no predispositions about Asperger's up to this point. Nonetheless, I sympathized with his condition and with his loneliness, and knew that I wouldn't make him feel the same. Many vacations to theme parks, Disney World, and Star Wars conventions later, I'm proud to say I've had a significant impact on Davie's life. Our friendship simply would not have existed had we been born 10-20 years earlier. Davie is merely one among a few of the friends I made playing CWA that will likely last a lifetime. There is also Craig, a proud Canadian with an outstanding sense of humor, Daniel, a former Alaskan with a passion for playing pranks, Nick, a brit who defies the laws of sleep just to play games with us, and Casey, the butt of our jokes on our Discord server, where we all talk to each other on a daily basis. I almost forgot Eggs, Arlen, Rex... there's so many of them Oh, and there's Jordin. I met him through my YouTube channel, as we reached out to do a collaboration that would grow both of our channels. We had no idea we would become such awesome friends after that. Since then, we've produced a ton of podcasts about gaming, movies, the news, and life advice. He's on the list of online friends I have yet to meet. Yes, I've met most of my online friends in real life. Last year in April, Davie, Craig, Casey and I joined up at Star Wars Celebration in Orlando, Florida. I rode roller coasters for a day with Daniel at Cedar Point, Ohio during my Senior Week trip. I have yet to meet Nick or Jordin, but I'm working on that. It's a small shame more of my friendships from CWA didn't last beyond the game's shutdown in 2014, but I am extremely grateful for the online best friends I have now nonetheless. Reflecting on the friendships I have now, both over the internet and in person, I find there is one thing I may have overlooked in my time at college so far. Friendships are built on experience. This can apply to sharing a background of similar experiences to another, or experiencing something for the first time, at the same time as someone else. For whatever reason, experiences have proven time and time again to strengthen the bond we share with others. It could be that we are naturally alone, and that going through something new with another person teaches us to stick by someone else, almost as a survival instinct. Perhaps in experiencing something new, we see a person beyond their words and for their actions, which helps to break any thin veil of mistrust we project on strangers. It could simply be that experiences give us something to talk about. Whatever the case, we are drawn to the people who live life with us. For a young tween in a new environment who felt alone and afraid, experiencing virtual worlds built on adventure and escapism drew me to the people living in that virtual world with me. As a teenager beginning high school, experiencing cross country and track drew me to the people running their tired little hearts out with me. And for a young adult trying to find his place in an urban jungle, experiencing something new and exciting will draw me to people who are trying to find their place too. This is a thought I'll be keeping in my back pocket for the next few months. And for anyone reading this who may relate with my dilemma, I hope you keep a similar thought in your back pocket as well. Experiencing something with someone else is not guaranteed to get us new friends, but it at least increases our likeliness. To be honest, I believe I have the best friends I do now partially due to fate, but that's not really something one can control. But hopefully the journey I've shared with my internet friends is a testament that in the 21st century, friendships know no barriers. How exciting! Until I do experience something new, until I do form a bond with someone new, I have my online friends to come talk to--to come home to-- every single night. Thank God for Wi-Fi. 8/19/2018 0 Comments Journeys in Ocean CityLeading up to the start of summer, I was having some of the best few months of my life and was bursting with anticipation for the warmth and vibrancy of spring and summer, my favorite seasons. By the end of April I was returning from a vacation in Orlando and was fully expecting to arrive home to a full bloom Spring, since it hadn't completely reached that point before my trip. And driving home after flying into BWI, it definitely had... but I wasn't feeling the glee I was expecting to feel. To be honest, I felt quite empty and couldn't express why. Maybe this is my theatrical side talking more than my rational side, but that vacation was probably the last time I could say I had peace and happiness within myself. Now I was depressed, and so many things in life were starting to go wrong. I've struggled with depression before, but I was convinced those phases were consequences of the intense pressure and stress I was under at the time. I believed that with peace of mind and heart, something I have spent the past year practicing, it would never return. But there I found myself, pushing family and friends away and isolating myself as I always have when dealing with depression, somehow in denial about what I was going through. Eventually I acknowledged it, but I still insisted on handling it alone. I resorted to movies and games as I have in the past, expecting to be 'moved' as I usually am by these things. But I was not moved. Everything I watched or consumed struck a very fragile note in me. Movies, my one constant in the whole wide world, felt like they were only there to break me. I searched every corner of my life for some morsel of happiness, but I always returned empty handed. This left me entirely helpless. I reached my lowest point a little over two weeks ago. I felt like I was drowning in an enclosed tank of all my problems. I had to make some serious decisions about my future- college, my career, where I want to live- and all of a sudden, a thought seeps into my brain. And for the first time in my life, I logically understood that thought. It made sense to me. And the fact that it did, was utterly terrifying. After aggressively isolating myself for so long, I finally reached out to some of my friends. They were certainly a huge help, but the thought cropped up again two days later. In my experience, a mother's intuition almost never fails. Even if they don't know exactly the problem, they can always sense when you are disturbed by something. My mom sensed that, and came up to my room to ask if I was okay. Discussing mental illness with my parents can be a bit of a taboo subject at times, due to some previous negative experiences in our household regarding mental illness. Thus I've always avoided talking to my parents about it when I really should have someone to discuss it with. But at that moment, I knew that I needed help, and that I can't be silent about my problems forever if I want a healthy relationship with my parents going forward. So, I told her. I think the conversation that followed was everything I never knew I needed to hear. She comforted me and calmed my anxieties about the future, told me that I did the right thing to speak up about it, and reassured me that the best of what life has to offer is very much in front of me. And then she offered to take me to Ocean City, Maryland for a few days, as a therapy vacation. Being that I hadn't been to a beach in over 7 years, I of course agreed. And having the trip to look forward to helped me feel better for a bit. But as we set out to Ocean City the morning of this past Monday, I was suddenly very anxious. What if the beach isn't what I remember it being? Wouldn't it be better to hold onto the beautiful memory of it rather than risk being disappointed by it in person? And am I even going to be able to have fun in my current mental state? Though those anxieties followed me, the only thing I was certain of was that driving down 83 would be a great time to take a car nap. There was at least one constant delight in my thoughts on the drive down however: vacations with my mom are always unique. Some of my favorite memories of my mother are of the Civil War trips the two us would take out of our love for history. We went from town to town, hotel to hotel, restaurant to restaurant, all hopped up on the adventure and thrill of finding things we never anticipated to find. I think we knew what to expect going into Ocean City, but in the back of our heads, we must've anticipated something unexpected. Which was exactly what happened. Driving down Baltimore Avenue, we looked for any hotel with vacancies to stop at. We quickly realized we could stay pretty much anywhere we wanted, so we rented a room at The Admiral; the same hotel my mom stayed at when she first came to Ocean City, when she was 19. The cycle of vacationing is truly interesting. We moved into our room across the parking lot, passing two men shooting the breeze on the porch outside their room, and settled down. My mom was expecting a call from her best friend and told me I could do whatever I wanted in the meantime-- walk the boardwalk, get food, etc. So naturally, I took a nap. About an hour later I heard a loud knock on the door and rolled out of bed to answer it. I poked my head through to see my mom chatting with the same two gentlemen we passed earlier. Apparently she never knocked on the door, but wanted to introduce me to her new friends. A father and his son. The son was about to be a senior at Penn State and wanted to give me some pointers about college. For now, I responded to my anxiety and crept back inside. When dinner time rolled around I decided I should also roll myself out of the hotel. That's when I was formally introduced to the two men- Mike and his son Hunter. They invited us to find dinner on the bay side, so we took them up on their offer. While we walked the bay and stopped locals to give us pointers on the best places to eat, Hunter struck up a conversation with me about college. He's a senior in college, and was standing behind me on everything I was doing with going to Temple University as a Freshman. It caught me off-guard to have a stranger seem so genuinely interested in my life pursuits. Eventually we found a restaurant called the Lazy Lizard and sat down at a table literally on the bay. "Any closer and we'd be in the bay," as Mike put it. Over dinner, Hunter and I talked about more college, video games, and filmmaking. He asked me if I've made any films, and I told him about The Shadow Boxer and how it won a state award. I also told him about how I make revenue from YouTube, and he was completely blown away. He immediately told Mike and they were both in awe of me. I felt so special to have these strangers be so invested in my life... and I did nothing to deserve it. After an amazing sunset and some amazing food, I felt something in me budge. I felt lighter. A cloud still followed me, but the rain wasn't so scary anymore. I looked at these half-buzzed strangers and felt some glint of happiness. Mike and Hunter wouldn't let a worry in the world touch them. They were here on behalf of simple things- a good sunset, good food, and good company. And all we had to was share that with them. I couldn't completely put away my life stresses, but as for my anxieties about the vacation- those were gone. The following day I went for a run along the bay and partially the boardwalk and let the breeze hit me. I passed Mike and my mom enjoying a friendly conversation along the bay and I again- felt lighter. A bit before noon we rejoined Mike and Hunter to hang out on the beach. And for the first time in what felt like another life, I stood in the waves and let them hit me. To me, the Ocean represents a net of life. All land-masses of the world are touched by a body of water, and every body of water is connected. So, the Ocean, in some sense, connects us all. To stand in the warm ocean waves and be hit by their steadiness is to feel the best of life and what it has to offer. That's what I feel, anyway. And maybe Mike or Hunter didn't understand the waves in the same way I did, but they definitely found their own meaning it. It was another simple thing to them. Something that doesn't need to be earned or deserved- only enjoyed. Later that night we all headed out for dinner at another excellent restaurant along the bay and saw some of the boats along the dock. Hunter told me about how he wanted to be that friend who had all the expensive things just so he can share it with his friends. I told him the same- though that will have to wait until I make enough money doing what I love to do that. But I promise friends- I will have a boat! Now if you ever went with me to a theme park or a boardwalk, and we passed the arcade, you would have no choice but to follow me into the arcade. So naturally, we arranged to have a ski ball tournament, and set the teams as new vs the old. My mom and Mike were big talk at dinner, but Hunter and I maintained our composure and wanted the results to speak for itself. My mom and Mike had a good start, but were caught off-guard as Hunter and I surpassed their scores in the first round. They stepped it up and won the second round, but we weren't about to lose that easily. We brought it home in the third round for the 2/3 win.. or so we thought. Mom and Hunter upped it to best 3/5, of course. A bit unfair, but we were still going to win. In the forth round I fell off a bit and couldn't get hit a very good score. Hunter carried me during the round, but it let my mom and Mike catch up and take the round. And by the fifth round, everyone was at their A-game. Hunter took lots of time between each roll. I had my best round of the entire game too. And by the end, we edged the old out by only 10 points. Victory for the youth! We had a running joke from the night before about 'petting a monkey' that someone brought with them to the Lazy Lizard. Mike established that the best pickup line ever may just be 'want to pet my monkey'? Of course, when we pooled our tickets together, we traded it in for a purple monkey and an eye-patch, which we proceeded to put over the monkey and hung it off my mom's purse. The rest of the night was spent playing party games, doing bumper cars, riding roller coasters and walking the boardwalk. And for the first time in weeks, I felt an escape. I wasn't thinking about anything but the fun I was having. We checked out of The Admiral before 10:00 the following morning. But before we did, we exchanged contact information with Mike and Hunter, hugged it out, and bid them adieu. The drive home was sorta sad since we hadn't planned on staying any longer and I had work the next day, but otherwise, we heavily considered staying.
And being home after having that escape, worried me. Would I sink back into the feeling I had before I took the trip? Was all of it about to be for nothing? No, actually. There was a valuable lesson I learned from that vacation; that happiness doesn't have to be earned or deserved. It's not always a stable relationship, an advantageous career move, overcoming a difficult situation, or having your artwork appreciated. In fact, these can be instances where we base happiness off validation in our own abilities. But a big part of life is accepting that A) we are going to mess up a lot of situations B) there's so much we don't know. If we put our happiness on hold for our big breaks alone, we won't survive long enough to experience the big breaks. Truthfully, happiness is sometimes as simple as a pretty sunset, an ocean breeze, a refreshing drink, a game of ski ball, or making new friends. It takes very little to enjoy these things. Simply be there, and find meaning in it. On the subject of depression, considering it is something I experienced going to Ocean City and still deal with to some extent, it can render a person unable to properly enjoy something due to the chemical imbalances offset in the brain. And I can absolutely attest to that: I didn't enjoy anything about Ocean City initially. But then we met Mike and Hunter, and that changed everything. The more time we spent with them, the more I started seeing and enjoying Ocean City through their eyes. And their unconditional kind regard toward my mom and I welcomed me into that position. Without them, that vacation would not have been the same. If there's anyone reading this dealing with depression, or struggling to find happiness in their current life situation, here's my advice, based on my experience with Ocean City and everything since. 1) Don't just smell the roses. Eat them! This whole summer I've been trying to enjoy little things purely for the sake of saying that I did them. But what I really should have been doing is taking things that usually 'cheer me up' and doing something different with them. Something that would give me a fresh perspective. For me, an example of that might've been running in Ocean City. I run everyday, but never at a beach or a bay. That may be hard to do in your current situation, but think about something you usually enjoy and how you could maybe change something about it. 2) Spend time with kind people! Mike and Hunter were the best possible strangers we could've met up with on vacation. And though I had difficulty enjoying things initially, the more time spent with them, the more I felt appreciated and allowed to enjoy the same things they had enjoyed. Kindness opens so many more doors than you think! Maybe finding someone who is naturally kind is difficult in your current situation. But a good way to detect kind people is to be kind yourself. It may be challenging, but it could lead to an interaction that makes your whole day. And it will give you the chance to view the world through another person's eyes. 3) Travel! Self-exclamatory, but so-so important. Spending a lot of time at home or your usual environment can leave you feeling in a rut, or make a difficult situation seem impossible. But traveling always reminds you of the world beyond your own. And to step into another world, where at least some of your problems are behind you, makes a big difference. If you aren't financially capable of traveling whenever you feel like, make efforts to save up money and be motivated by the fantasy of being somewhere you genuinely want to go. The world is truly an amazing place. The only thing stopping us from exploring it is honestly money. It's been my pleasure to share this journey with you all. I will be writing many posts again in the future- so stay alert! Thank you, and have a great day! |
Journeys"Life's a journey, not a destination," famously said by American philosopher Ralph Waldo Emerson. The idea that our individual goals are not as important as the journey taken to reach them is probably something we can easily acknowledge, but have difficulty in truly embracing. But if we stopped to smell the roses a little more and searched for more meaning in the lightest touches of life, maybe we will truly be living the journey. In the spirit of doing just that, I've set out to chronicle my own journeys in life- the journeys of Parkes Harman. ArchivesCategories |